I have put on 2kgs in the past week.

Sneaking suspicion tells me that having a sister who now works at Subway & takes home free cookies might not actually be such a thrilling long-term prospect for my gut & thighs. Add the fact that I am a proud owner of a decent stash of Easter chocolate (on account of I make my mother give me an egg hunt every year) & there may or may not be a delectable box of Max Brenner chocolates hanging out in my pantry.

Did I mention the word 'glutton' didn't come into fruition until 1989 when, incidentally, I was born?

Anyway, last night I attended Djordje's 21st, & I totally met the members of my desired family-to-be, by this I totally mean Parkour kids. Also, since when was it even legal for attractive girls to have decent brain skillz?! Yeah, met some of that variety too, & to say "I FELT INTIMIDATED, YO" might be an understatement. BUT, credit where it's due, so this is the part where I say thanks to mein papa for being an absolute sport & driving me roughly 67billion kms, on account of I am inept at life!

Here, obligatory picture with the birthday swine in which I hide half his face with my large head.


&


Shaun (in black Australian Parkour shirt) was my myspace friend for about a year. & WE MET IN THE FLESH, zomg small world.

& on the thread of birthdays, a happy dedication also goes out to Evan. To commemorate this special event, I am copy + pasting a screenshot of a recent conversation that made me guffaw like dead baby jokes make me guffaw:


On that note, happy birthday to the rest of you April-offpsring. Facebook tells me I have more friends celebrating their exeunts from the womb at this time. WHY are all the parents procreating in July? & more importantly, WHY are parents even procreating at all?! Tough questions, I say.

I think sleep is in order. Goodnight.
x

Posted in: 21st, april birthdays, babyporridge, food guilt, nikki malvar, parkour, picturepost on Monday, April 13, 2009 at at 6:40 PM 5 comments  

This morning, I had every intention of throwing around words about a new fascination of mine, until I was rear-ended by another car, & decided, that perhaps a shift in today's blog content would be appropriate. When I say 'I was rear-ended', it is not actually my dramatically bad use of metaphor coming into play, I meant it in the absolute literal sense of ZOMG MY CAR GOT HIT.

If my car could talk, I think she'd say that she's not too fond of the homo-erotic experience. I may be a little presumptuous to say that she probably doesn't appreciate it up the arse, but that is her business!

So tomorrow, I have the gleeful task of attaining a repairs quote & taking a poor soul's money.

BUT ANYWAY.
What I had initially intended to blog about was how the $2 markup on asparagus is taking a decisive toll on my quality of life. Really? No, not really.

Parkour has recently been brought to my attention like the fact that test-tube babies aren't actually grown in petri-dishes has recently been brought to my attention. & BY GOSH, I am utterly fascinated by parkour & harbouring the resolve to learn. DEAR AGILITY OF MINE, GOOD FREAKING LUCK.

But I insist on you watching the following youtube clip featuring David Belle, who is largely credited for founding parkour. Not only did the video get a chortle out of this esophagus, but Mr. Belle is also quite easy on the eyes. By 'quite easy on the eyes', I might actually mean 'absolutely delicious'. Now, watch:


I think what makes parkour so appealing to me is the extent of discipline required of mind & body, & hot damn would I like some! Not to mention, I might actually have something more credible than my overworked 'I can do origami' catchphrase when faced with an assailant in a dark alleyway or the underside of a bus.

I did say that a driving theme of 2009 is fitness, & while I am quite proud of my dedication thus far, I feel like I'm hitting a plateau in terms of its physical manifestation. Or maybe it's just the fact that I can't reconcile my desire t0 look fit with my desire to stay in kahoots with my first love, which inevitably happens to be food & its constant consumption! Ay, Dios Mio, I don't know. But I do know that parkour is sexy, & I want in.

I have papers to write & ups to push, so my disappearance starts now!
chyeah.

Posted in: babyporridge, car accident, fitness, nikki malvar, parkour, rear ended on Sunday, March 29, 2009 at at 7:07 PM 5 comments