i'm in the journalism lab at uni working on a project due on thursday, when procrastination hits me like a drunk boyfriend & i google "babyporridge".


there are several things wrong with the third link.
1) THE BABYPORRIDGE.COM DOMAIN NAME SHOULD BE OWNED BY ME,
2) I AM NOT A SOCIAL NETWORKING SITE, &
3) IF I WERE A SOCIAL NETWORKING SITE, I WOULD BE CALLED 'TURDFACE ELITE'

regardless of whether or not i intended on becoming an internet conglomerate of sorts, i put a face behind the 'babyporridge' name. i know im probably getting my knickers into a tighter knot than is socially advised, but this makes me angry.

do i even have any options available to me in a quest to regain ownership of this domain name?

babyporridge.com, i hope your next eight meals taste like shit.

Posted in: on Monday, May 26, 2008 at at 1:45 PM 8 comments  

beauty is eternity gazing at itself in the mirror
but you are eternity & you are the mirror.
(~kahlil gibran: 'the prophet')

i feel so generally uninspired these days.

Posted in: on Friday, May 23, 2008 at at 9:46 PM 3 comments  

on a whim, i clicked the 'statistics & data' button for my 'Dear Inspiration' video & discovered the 'premium' category.

what on earth?

i always instinctively associate the word 'premium' with beef, & i was momentarily offended at youtube for calling me processed meat.

anyway, i think this is just pain talking.
my limbs are still so painful & everytime i move, my head decides to die a little. i also think there are gremlins breeding in my stomach.
(i had to ring queenie at five thirty a.m. this morning asking her to take my shift. I'M SO SORRY. I LOVE YOU.)

Posted in: on Saturday, May 17, 2008 at at 1:28 PM 2 comments  

my stomach is throbbing & my head is thumping.
i will jot down these aches & remember them for later -- later is when the moon smiles for someone else, when the floorboards creak under someone else's weight.

australia is a drought-ridden place & my mind feels very much like australia.
my inability to create is driving me insane. this afternoon i shot some clips with the intention of putting up a video, but it's turning out disgustingly sub-par, & showcasing sub-par things are the bane of my existence.

ugh. screenshots of said video:



i know, i know, i grow terribly unattractive by day.

there are three weeks until this semester of uni comes to a close & i'm chanting (like too much a plea & too little a prayer) that my fickle friend inspiration will come back.
am also counting down the sleeps till i board a plane & whisk myself off to the philippines - my motherland, how i tremble to touch my feet to your grounds!

as of now, it's 23 sleeps!

speaking of twenty-three:
* in june, twenty-three will mark my one year anniversary of being on the 'tube, &
* in july, twenty-three will mark my nineteenth birthdaghhh

i think it's comforting how close to nobody reads this blog... that just means i'm at liberty to disclose more of myself here than i would on video.

I WOULD LIKE TO TAKE THIS OPPORTUNITY TO TELL YOU ALL THAT I HATE YOU & THAT THE TOOTH FAIRY HATES YOUR STINKING TEETH.

leslie feist is divine & her music is the ultimate for driving home at night.
my stomach hurts like a killer's wife & i am going to go now.


yeah, i was definitely a babe.

Posted in: on Friday, May 16, 2008 at at 6:14 PM 11 comments  

went to my seventh grade singing exam at the 'australian musical examinations board' on tuesday.

in a situation where you're asked to choose between tree-stump grinding or needlepoint, you pick the tree stumps. in this post, my exam would equate with needlepoint & hence, we will not discuss it..

pictures, in all tree-stump glory:





hughberry was (& forever will be) my amazing accompanist.



we found a queen-bee several stops down & i was eternally glad because i like queen-bee a lot & even more than dried mangoes, which is an ample lot.



my friends are heavy drinkers.





& now for some phenomenal celebrity-look-alikes;

gemma ward


e.t.'s filthy mistress

Posted in: on Friday, May 9, 2008 at at 12:55 AM 7 comments  

mother: you still weren't home & you didn't pick up your cell-phone. i thought you were lying on the street somewhere & the police would come to the door
...& i thought about how, when i'd answer the door, they'd see me in my peacoat & pyjamas

thanks infinitely, mom.
haw haw


colder days are not kind to me - my nose is home to compellingly large volumes of snot & my throat's dryness puts the sahara to shame. true story.

yesterday, i waddled out the back door, buckling under the weight of my basket of freshly laundered goodness, when the the door slammed shut.

upon realising that my key was in the inside of the door, i subsequently panicked.
when panicking didn't lead to miracles or any sort of spontaneous magical powers during the moments of duress, i decided to do the practical thing & hang my laundry to dry.

the act of hanging laundry eventually comes to pass & it was then that i decided to panic again :D

ran around the backyard like a diseased cow & chewed through branches & pounced on critters & climbed over the (locked) fence. (note that some portions of the last sentence may or may not have been embellished)

eventually clawed my way into the street & harassed a neighbor & technology felt lovely against my ears & dad eventually came bearing salvation in the form of house key.

--

the health department is apparently raising the price of mixed alcoholic drinks in an attempt to combat underage binge drinking.
i don't think it'll be very effective, but personally, it doesn't concern me.

I LOVE TEH WINESSS INSTEAD!1!111!!!
& now a pic-spam from when we went to the vineyards:

Posted in: on Wednesday, April 30, 2008 at at 9:11 AM 6 comments  

hello to my ample readership of three people!

real life's been eventful, to say the least.
i've worked 40+ hrs in the past week & i'm starting to abhor the sight of newbies & lettuce leaves & the mop-bucket.

rose, the supervisor at work, who wears dreadlocks & intimidation like a fashion statement, wrote me an endearing list on a long roll of receipt paper called:

reason #4 - "you bleed too much when i stab you"
reason #7 - "there are too many pies in the oven"

i kept the list very close to my heart, otherwise known as my bag, & i told rose that the note may make an appearance in a future video.

oh, visual representations of my fifteen seconds of fame lame from last week:



the channel seven spiel was a whirlwind of confusion, assuming that whirlwinds are actually confused. i got a call during my lunchbreak regarding a potential interview & channel seven apparated outside work within an hr's time.

obviously there are YouTube notables at much higher levels (of subscribers / charm) but i was most accessible in terms of geography & willingness.
channel seven used footage of nat simultaneously with the duration of the voiceover that said, "babyporridge has been on youtube for ten months".

wow.

because that's not a stuff-up or anything.
& there are lots of angry souls over the fact that channel seven sourced videos off YouTube without consent or acknowledgment, & i've blahblahed lots about this now, so you can just go watch it yourself.



i'm tired.
BYE.

Posted in: on Wednesday, April 23, 2008 at at 8:35 PM 12 comments